2 years ago, tomorrow, God gave us our second little girl, who we named, Faith Makiera. We love her dearly, but this post is not about her. That will be tomorrows. :)
Gloria and Faith were both born in Namibia. We were able to get ultrasounds at every check up. It was nice. The doctors have the machines and it is rather routine to do them at pretty much every visit.
I'll never forget the day. It was a routine check up. I had been feeling so very tired lately and just thought that it was that 'early 1st trimester weariness.' I hadn't remembered being this tired with Gloria, but then again I wasn't looking after a 1 year old as well.
Dr. Burmiester. We really like him. At first, not so much... but he kinda grows on ya. Quiet. Dry (and very funny) humor. Afrikaaner.
I was seven weeks along. He was doing the ultrasound and was very quite. I remember getting a bit concerned. Then he said, 'Well, it looks like twins.'
WHAT?!?! Complete shock. Twins run NO WHERE in either side of our families. ..and I mean, nowhere.
They were in the same sac. It means they were the same gender and identical. We listened to both heart beats. We have the picture. We told everyone we knew. I don't regret it.
3 weeks later, we went back. One was gone.
It was so early that many, though sad for us, didn't see it as 'that big of a deal.' These things happen all the time. In fact, though at first, it was hard to swallow, I think we convinced ourselves that it wasn't as big of a deal.
My dear friend Lise, in Namibia, called me up and insisted that she was coming to visit. I was irritated. I was fine. I didn't need to process, and to be honest, if I remember right, I had a lot going on that day.
I'm so glad she came.
Lise and her husband have had much suffering and learned much of God's grace in the midst of it. I needed to hear these things. I needed to hear about life. I needed to hear about loss. I needed to hear and see the testimony of the Christian who has been through and in suffering. I needed to hear about how the Christian embraces hard things as coming from the Lord. We don't run from it. We don't pretend it isn't happening. We experience God's grace in it.
So, on this day, I also remember.
I remember that God gives and that He takes away. I remember that He is good, and my heart rests with full and unwavering peace right there. Blessed be His name....
Saturday, January 22, 2011
Sunday, January 16, 2011
An Outlet
You might want to skip this one.
All my little ones (and not so little ;) are in bed, and I am needing an outlet to process. I generally process well when I write, so that is what this is. I don't yet know the conclusion. Truth be told, I'm not even quite sure of what my problem is.
I'm not afraid to end on a down note. I know God often takes us 'down' to teach us many beautiful things. He is indeed, beautiful. I'm not afraid to end on a high note, either. Where can we run from His presence? As if we wanted too.
Feelings are funny things. If I had to say how I felt, I would describe it by saying I kinda, sorta, feel like I'm stuck in the airport and not sure if I'm coming, or going.
Square Peg. Round Hole. Unsettled. Yes, but No. Missing. Wondering. Remembering. Hoping. Questions.
I'm a bit in that place.
Actively flinging myself to Christ. Gospelizing myself. Learning. Learning. Learning some more.
I'm landing there.
There was never a time in my life that I didn't want to be a missionary. That I didn't have a knowing that it was what I wanted and desired to do. Always, I knew.
We were.
Those who are meeting us now, for the first time, it's an interesting detail. A story to be told. For us, it was our life.
Desire is still there. We want full time ministry. Not because we are not called to be 'in the world,' but because it is the pounding, beating, passionate, cry of our hearts to reach and teach those who need the Gospel. Those who want the Gospel.
Exhale.
What now? Here is my struggle. Right here.
Here is where I'm busy trusting and hoping and praying and knowing that Jesus upholds the universe. The entire universe by simply the word of his power. Surely, He upholds our hearts. Surely He is upholding our hearts.
There are moments, more than I would care to admit, that I fear. I fear that we will never be on the mission field again. I fear that Todd will never pastor a church. I fear that how life is now is how it will always be.
Fear is paralyzing. Crippling. Agonizing.
But Oh for the perfect love of Christ that drives out paralyzing, crippling and agonizing fear! The Perfect Love that created desire. The Perfect Love that gives desire. The Perfect Love that satisfies desire.
The. Perfect. Love.
God-given desires are not treasure maps. God doesn't put them in our hearts and then wait to see if we can figure out which road to go down, which path to follow, so that we might satisfy them. So that we might arrive. This is not the Christian's God.
Our God gives desires. He gives desires that are His desires. He gives desires that He might satisfy them. He gives desires according to His plan. And He is faithful to His plan. Faithfully, Faithful.
"What then shall we say to these things. If God is for us, who can be against us?" (Rom 8:31)
Better. Much Better.
All my little ones (and not so little ;) are in bed, and I am needing an outlet to process. I generally process well when I write, so that is what this is. I don't yet know the conclusion. Truth be told, I'm not even quite sure of what my problem is.
I'm not afraid to end on a down note. I know God often takes us 'down' to teach us many beautiful things. He is indeed, beautiful. I'm not afraid to end on a high note, either. Where can we run from His presence? As if we wanted too.
Feelings are funny things. If I had to say how I felt, I would describe it by saying I kinda, sorta, feel like I'm stuck in the airport and not sure if I'm coming, or going.
Square Peg. Round Hole. Unsettled. Yes, but No. Missing. Wondering. Remembering. Hoping. Questions.
I'm a bit in that place.
Actively flinging myself to Christ. Gospelizing myself. Learning. Learning. Learning some more.
I'm landing there.
There was never a time in my life that I didn't want to be a missionary. That I didn't have a knowing that it was what I wanted and desired to do. Always, I knew.
We were.
Those who are meeting us now, for the first time, it's an interesting detail. A story to be told. For us, it was our life.
Desire is still there. We want full time ministry. Not because we are not called to be 'in the world,' but because it is the pounding, beating, passionate, cry of our hearts to reach and teach those who need the Gospel. Those who want the Gospel.
Exhale.
What now? Here is my struggle. Right here.
Here is where I'm busy trusting and hoping and praying and knowing that Jesus upholds the universe. The entire universe by simply the word of his power. Surely, He upholds our hearts. Surely He is upholding our hearts.
There are moments, more than I would care to admit, that I fear. I fear that we will never be on the mission field again. I fear that Todd will never pastor a church. I fear that how life is now is how it will always be.
Fear is paralyzing. Crippling. Agonizing.
But Oh for the perfect love of Christ that drives out paralyzing, crippling and agonizing fear! The Perfect Love that created desire. The Perfect Love that gives desire. The Perfect Love that satisfies desire.
The. Perfect. Love.
God-given desires are not treasure maps. God doesn't put them in our hearts and then wait to see if we can figure out which road to go down, which path to follow, so that we might satisfy them. So that we might arrive. This is not the Christian's God.
Our God gives desires. He gives desires that are His desires. He gives desires that He might satisfy them. He gives desires according to His plan. And He is faithful to His plan. Faithfully, Faithful.
"What then shall we say to these things. If God is for us, who can be against us?" (Rom 8:31)
Better. Much Better.
Saturday, January 15, 2011
The Complete Work of Christ.
How redemptive is the redemptive work of Christ? How do you measure it? Is it complete? Is it in part? What are its implications? Is it part God, part us? Which part, exactly? How does it play out when we sin? Dose it change it? When we sin, is it because we didn't do our part? (Whatever part that is.)
Today.
Today I went to an event where there was a Christian who had made a big mistake. The guilt and the shame were evident. People had mixed feelings. Most people didn't know how to feel.
All I could think was, 'That it could have been me.' It could have been any of us in that room. And my heart was full of compassion.
Guilt and Shame.
Just the words themselves have a certain weight to them, don't they? Like iron in the pit of your stomach. Like a heavy, wet, suffocating, blanket that you can't get out from under.
I remember. I remember when....
My sin was who I thought I was.
I didn't know how I got to that point and, I thought I'd never be whole again.
I wept. I screamed. I wanted to 'wake up' and RUN.
And then.
And then, the Gospel came.
In this moment. In this moment RIGHT now, I want to stand on the highest mountain and in the lowest valley, with every part of my being, and with the loudest voice I have, proclaim for all to hear....
"CHRIST'S. WORK. OF REDEMPTION. IS COMPLETE! IT'S COMPLETE, IT'S COMPLETE, IT IS COMPLETE!"
Nothing can be added to it. Nothing can be taken away.
Your sin is NOT who. you. are.
Every one of us. Every single Christian has done thing they wish they never would have done. never.
But, they do not define us.
If God looked at us through our sin, even on our BEST day, who of us could stand? Tell me. Who?
If you do not understand the work of redemption, then when you sin, the guilt and the shame can make you feel like you are living in a vegetative state and you just want someone to pull the plug.
But when you grasp, when you REALLY grasp, the complete and finished work of Christ, you RUN. Not inward.... Not outward.... But TO. ...And life is abundant.
"Oh praise the One who paid my debt and raised this life up from the dead.... Jesus."
You don't wear a scarlet letter. You are clothed in the very righteousness of Christ.
"For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God." (2 Cor 5:21)
Today.
Today I went to an event where there was a Christian who had made a big mistake. The guilt and the shame were evident. People had mixed feelings. Most people didn't know how to feel.
All I could think was, 'That it could have been me.' It could have been any of us in that room. And my heart was full of compassion.
Guilt and Shame.
Just the words themselves have a certain weight to them, don't they? Like iron in the pit of your stomach. Like a heavy, wet, suffocating, blanket that you can't get out from under.
I remember. I remember when....
My sin was who I thought I was.
I didn't know how I got to that point and, I thought I'd never be whole again.
I wept. I screamed. I wanted to 'wake up' and RUN.
And then.
And then, the Gospel came.
In this moment. In this moment RIGHT now, I want to stand on the highest mountain and in the lowest valley, with every part of my being, and with the loudest voice I have, proclaim for all to hear....
"CHRIST'S. WORK. OF REDEMPTION. IS COMPLETE! IT'S COMPLETE, IT'S COMPLETE, IT IS COMPLETE!"
Nothing can be added to it. Nothing can be taken away.
Your sin is NOT who. you. are.
Every one of us. Every single Christian has done thing they wish they never would have done. never.
But, they do not define us.
If God looked at us through our sin, even on our BEST day, who of us could stand? Tell me. Who?
If you do not understand the work of redemption, then when you sin, the guilt and the shame can make you feel like you are living in a vegetative state and you just want someone to pull the plug.
But when you grasp, when you REALLY grasp, the complete and finished work of Christ, you RUN. Not inward.... Not outward.... But TO. ...And life is abundant.
"Oh praise the One who paid my debt and raised this life up from the dead.... Jesus."
You don't wear a scarlet letter. You are clothed in the very righteousness of Christ.
"For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God." (2 Cor 5:21)
Friday, January 14, 2011
Ready (not so sure), Set (wait just a moment!), Go (Hey now!)
Oh where, oh where, did my newborn go? Miss Felicity is on the move, and this Mommy doesn't quite know how she feels about that.
Thursday, January 13, 2011
This and That.
Seriously, I'm beginning to think I should have titled this blog something along the lines of Random Ramblings, because that's all I can seem to post.
If you haven't seen us in a while, rest assured all is well. Well, I guess 'well' is rather subjective. :)
Honestly, I feel like we just can't get ahead. Everyone has been sick with some sort of yuckiness at various times and it's kept us house bound for just about as long as this Mommy can handle.
So, I completely rearranged our living room furniture.
I don't know if it's because I've been cooped up for so many days in a row with four (precious) children, and just needed to feel like I was somewhere new, or the room really needed a revamp. Either way, I love it.
It's amazing how good some rearranging of the furniture works for the soul. New views, new angles, new places to curl up with a good book and coffee.
I think the kids feel the same way. New hide-and-seek places, new ways to build tents and castles, new spaces to dance.
It works for us. :)
I relaxed Keano's hair the other day and he is learning to style it on his own. Some days it looks really sharp and makes me look twice. Other days? ...Well, we've all been there.
Gloria and Faith now both have these adooooooorable little 1920's flapper hair cuts and I'm convinced they look like they need to be speaking in British accents.
I started Keano's Battle Training. It's awesome. He loves it. I'm grateful. I want to brag.... but wont ;)
If you haven't seen us in a while, rest assured all is well. Well, I guess 'well' is rather subjective. :)
Honestly, I feel like we just can't get ahead. Everyone has been sick with some sort of yuckiness at various times and it's kept us house bound for just about as long as this Mommy can handle.
So, I completely rearranged our living room furniture.
I don't know if it's because I've been cooped up for so many days in a row with four (precious) children, and just needed to feel like I was somewhere new, or the room really needed a revamp. Either way, I love it.
It's amazing how good some rearranging of the furniture works for the soul. New views, new angles, new places to curl up with a good book and coffee.
I think the kids feel the same way. New hide-and-seek places, new ways to build tents and castles, new spaces to dance.
It works for us. :)
I relaxed Keano's hair the other day and he is learning to style it on his own. Some days it looks really sharp and makes me look twice. Other days? ...Well, we've all been there.
Gloria and Faith now both have these adooooooorable little 1920's flapper hair cuts and I'm convinced they look like they need to be speaking in British accents.
I started Keano's Battle Training. It's awesome. He loves it. I'm grateful. I want to brag.... but wont ;)
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
K.I.S.S.
When I was in youth group (back in the day), some of the guys held up a sign to our youth pastor that said K.I.S.S. Translated, Keep It Simple, Stupid.
I've come to a conclusion. Making the truths of the Gospel simple enough for those who wouldn't classify themselves as 'intellectuals' or even, children, and teenagers for that matter, is NOT an easy undertaking.
My hubby is SUPER intelligent... and well, me? Ummmm.... What can I say? Opposites attract?
Did you know that there are levels of of genius-ness (Yeah, I totally made that word up.) I didn't know that until I met Todd. And the only reason I know it is because he is 'sub' genius. Right under the 'genius' category. The only thing I have going for me is that I sleep next to him and maybe some of his intelligent brain waves come my way. Kidding, of course. :)
Have you ever learned about something rather HUGE and intricate and then someone asked you to explain, but you just didn't know where to start and how to simplify it? Well, that is smack dab where I am finding myself.
If you read my previous post, you know that I'm looking for some format to discuss the Gospel with Keano primarily, and I think I've found it.
We will be commencing Battle Training. (insert crazy, wild, manly, slightly tribal, battle cry)
Think WOW or paint ball or UFC training, ooooh, or better yet, that thing military people do to prepare themselves for the real battle. Yep, bring it on, baby! 'Cuz here we go!
And did I mention that this Mama knows how to have fun? LOTS of fun.
If you don't think I'm completely crazy and want to read on to the how I'm going to attempt this and why, then read on. If not, better to probably just forget this blog even exists because it's really only the beginning :)
Most Important: Why
The only way the Christian is going to be able to combat the struggle that comes his/her way (either through means of their own flesh, the enemy, or God Himself) is if they know how to apply the Gospel. If the Gospel is simply a list of 'be goods and do goods' as a means to earn God's approval or a means by which we come up to good with him, then we will end up in one of two categories.
1. Complete despair. Feeling and believing as though God is disappointed with us. In this persons mind they have failed God time and time again and simply can just not be good enough to have his approval or favor. Though they typically don't struggle with God's personal love for others, they immensely struggle with God's personal, lavishing, love for them. (This was me.) One can continue on in this for quite some time, but burn out is inevitable. It's like pouring water in your gas tank. ....eventually you're gonna stop.
Or
2. Arrogance. Feeling and believing that God is grateful to have you on His side. In this persons mind, they are the prime example of doing all the 'be goods and do goods' of Scripture and what would God do if He didn't have them? The Kingdom just might be at stake. They struggle understanding how other Christians continue to fall into the same 'sin' over and over again and compassion is not an attribute they usually have much of.
While teaching at a womens' conference in Namibia, my Mom gave us this definition of the Gospel:
"God has rescued us and is rescuing us. He has renewed us and is renewing us.... All through the person and work of Jesus Christ on our behalf."
On my best day, I could not rescue myself positionally or practically. I could not renew myself positionally nor practically. I need it to be done for me!
I love it! I love it, I love it, I love it! When I hear it preached or taught, I literally have to contain myself. (I suppose I also have to contain myself when the opposite is preached or taught as well. Once you've been freed you don't even like the sound of chains anymore.)
Back to my point.
The reason our Battle Training is important is so that when the battle comes, and it will (we'd be foolish to think not), I want Keano to know his arsenal. It's easy to think that just because he may know Scriptural facts and Biblical history that it will some how keep him from struggling. It wont. It wont, it wont, it wont. (not undermining the importance of those teachings, but if they are not in the context of the Gospel, then they are of little to no avail.)
The only way to keep him from a cycle of sin is if he knows how to apply the Gospel. Hands down.
'If I knew then, what I know now, I would....."
"Hind site is 20/20."
It's true. It's true for all of us. Christian or not, if we knew what trouble was coming our way, we would prepare for it. But, the truth is, trouble is coming. It will come for our kids. It will come for us. ....So we must teach them what to do when it comes. ...And it can't be a list of 'be goods and do goods.' There must be more. Those lists MUST be in the context of the Gospel or we are simply preparing them for failure.
Am I wrong? Tell me if I'm wrong.
The FUN part: How
This dear friends is important. ...Maybe equally as important to the 'why.'
The Gospel isn't boring. The Gospel isn't drudgery. The Gospel isn't a separate part of our lives. The Gospel is ALIVE. The Gospel is full of ENJOYMENT. And the Gospel, dear friends, includes EVERY part of our lives.
So, when teaching the Gospel to our little ones (or not so little ones) it must be THESE things. They mustn't hear one thing and see something else. Don't you remember how perceptive you were as a child/teenager? Don't you remember making those secret vows to yourself, saying "When I'm older, I'll never do....." or "I'll always....." Yeah, those would be the things I'm talking about.
I'm certainly not advocating 'law' at this moment, but before we engage in teaching our children the Gospel, we would be wise to seriously take a time out (sorry, we use that phrase a lot these days :) and ask ourselves is the Gospel alive to us? Does it bring us great joy? Has it permeated every part of our lives, or better yet, do we want it too?
Before we could ever even attempt to put a 'how' together we need to examine why we would even want to. (not that there is only one way. What I'm about to lay out is simply what I'm excited about with Keano. I'm sure it looks ENTIRELY different for each family/child/parent etc.)
Moving on. Here is my game plan for me and Keano.
We are going to study the amazing, miraculous, glorious way in how we went from the state of being enemies of God, to being called his son and daughter. In other words, The Order of Salvation.
If I just lost you and you went 'Ugh. ....What did I just read?' Well, don't check out on me quite yet. Hang in there!
Were going to spend 1 week on each of these topics.
Election
Calling: External and Internal
Regeneration/New Birth!
Conversion: Faith and Repentance
Justification
Adoption
Sanctification
Glorification
I'm going to be teaching these in FUN ways and SERIOUS ways. We'll be creative as to how to teach them. Think, illustrations, examples, stories, and dramas, music, comparisons, etc.
As for the specifics, check back later ;)
I've come to a conclusion. Making the truths of the Gospel simple enough for those who wouldn't classify themselves as 'intellectuals' or even, children, and teenagers for that matter, is NOT an easy undertaking.
My hubby is SUPER intelligent... and well, me? Ummmm.... What can I say? Opposites attract?
Did you know that there are levels of of genius-ness (Yeah, I totally made that word up.) I didn't know that until I met Todd. And the only reason I know it is because he is 'sub' genius. Right under the 'genius' category. The only thing I have going for me is that I sleep next to him and maybe some of his intelligent brain waves come my way. Kidding, of course. :)
Have you ever learned about something rather HUGE and intricate and then someone asked you to explain, but you just didn't know where to start and how to simplify it? Well, that is smack dab where I am finding myself.
If you read my previous post, you know that I'm looking for some format to discuss the Gospel with Keano primarily, and I think I've found it.
We will be commencing Battle Training. (insert crazy, wild, manly, slightly tribal, battle cry)
Think WOW or paint ball or UFC training, ooooh, or better yet, that thing military people do to prepare themselves for the real battle. Yep, bring it on, baby! 'Cuz here we go!
And did I mention that this Mama knows how to have fun? LOTS of fun.
If you don't think I'm completely crazy and want to read on to the how I'm going to attempt this and why, then read on. If not, better to probably just forget this blog even exists because it's really only the beginning :)
Most Important: Why
The only way the Christian is going to be able to combat the struggle that comes his/her way (either through means of their own flesh, the enemy, or God Himself) is if they know how to apply the Gospel. If the Gospel is simply a list of 'be goods and do goods' as a means to earn God's approval or a means by which we come up to good with him, then we will end up in one of two categories.
1. Complete despair. Feeling and believing as though God is disappointed with us. In this persons mind they have failed God time and time again and simply can just not be good enough to have his approval or favor. Though they typically don't struggle with God's personal love for others, they immensely struggle with God's personal, lavishing, love for them. (This was me.) One can continue on in this for quite some time, but burn out is inevitable. It's like pouring water in your gas tank. ....eventually you're gonna stop.
Or
2. Arrogance. Feeling and believing that God is grateful to have you on His side. In this persons mind, they are the prime example of doing all the 'be goods and do goods' of Scripture and what would God do if He didn't have them? The Kingdom just might be at stake. They struggle understanding how other Christians continue to fall into the same 'sin' over and over again and compassion is not an attribute they usually have much of.
While teaching at a womens' conference in Namibia, my Mom gave us this definition of the Gospel:
"God has rescued us and is rescuing us. He has renewed us and is renewing us.... All through the person and work of Jesus Christ on our behalf."
On my best day, I could not rescue myself positionally or practically. I could not renew myself positionally nor practically. I need it to be done for me!
I love it! I love it, I love it, I love it! When I hear it preached or taught, I literally have to contain myself. (I suppose I also have to contain myself when the opposite is preached or taught as well. Once you've been freed you don't even like the sound of chains anymore.)
Back to my point.
The reason our Battle Training is important is so that when the battle comes, and it will (we'd be foolish to think not), I want Keano to know his arsenal. It's easy to think that just because he may know Scriptural facts and Biblical history that it will some how keep him from struggling. It wont. It wont, it wont, it wont. (not undermining the importance of those teachings, but if they are not in the context of the Gospel, then they are of little to no avail.)
The only way to keep him from a cycle of sin is if he knows how to apply the Gospel. Hands down.
'If I knew then, what I know now, I would....."
"Hind site is 20/20."
It's true. It's true for all of us. Christian or not, if we knew what trouble was coming our way, we would prepare for it. But, the truth is, trouble is coming. It will come for our kids. It will come for us. ....So we must teach them what to do when it comes. ...And it can't be a list of 'be goods and do goods.' There must be more. Those lists MUST be in the context of the Gospel or we are simply preparing them for failure.
Am I wrong? Tell me if I'm wrong.
The FUN part: How
This dear friends is important. ...Maybe equally as important to the 'why.'
The Gospel isn't boring. The Gospel isn't drudgery. The Gospel isn't a separate part of our lives. The Gospel is ALIVE. The Gospel is full of ENJOYMENT. And the Gospel, dear friends, includes EVERY part of our lives.
So, when teaching the Gospel to our little ones (or not so little ones) it must be THESE things. They mustn't hear one thing and see something else. Don't you remember how perceptive you were as a child/teenager? Don't you remember making those secret vows to yourself, saying "When I'm older, I'll never do....." or "I'll always....." Yeah, those would be the things I'm talking about.
I'm certainly not advocating 'law' at this moment, but before we engage in teaching our children the Gospel, we would be wise to seriously take a time out (sorry, we use that phrase a lot these days :) and ask ourselves is the Gospel alive to us? Does it bring us great joy? Has it permeated every part of our lives, or better yet, do we want it too?
Before we could ever even attempt to put a 'how' together we need to examine why we would even want to. (not that there is only one way. What I'm about to lay out is simply what I'm excited about with Keano. I'm sure it looks ENTIRELY different for each family/child/parent etc.)
Moving on. Here is my game plan for me and Keano.
We are going to study the amazing, miraculous, glorious way in how we went from the state of being enemies of God, to being called his son and daughter. In other words, The Order of Salvation.
If I just lost you and you went 'Ugh. ....What did I just read?' Well, don't check out on me quite yet. Hang in there!
Were going to spend 1 week on each of these topics.
Election
Calling: External and Internal
Regeneration/New Birth!
Conversion: Faith and Repentance
Justification
Adoption
Sanctification
Glorification
I'm going to be teaching these in FUN ways and SERIOUS ways. We'll be creative as to how to teach them. Think, illustrations, examples, stories, and dramas, music, comparisons, etc.
As for the specifics, check back later ;)
Friday, December 17, 2010
Totally Random
I have 4 children and because of it, I think in lists. I didn't so much before they came. :)
So, here is a completely and utterly RANDOM list of the goings on of the 'Hammer Tribe' (and me personally.)
Note: After writing this, I came back up to the top to add that this is a rather long and extremely random post. It's mostly for the purpose of being able to look back on, so REALLY, feel free to just wait (don't hold your breath) for something more thought provoking :)
Personally:
Blogging Memories
A friend, who's girls are now teenagers told me that she wished she would have kept a journal of some sort so she could remember things about her girls when they were young. She said "You think you will remember these sorts of things, but really, you don't." That being said, "I NEED TO BLOG MORE!"
Health
I'm looking into homeopathic remedies. Roll your eyes or ask me what I discover. I'm still somewhere in between those two myself.
I just made my/our own toothpaste and am quite pleased. As for why, just do a quick research on the dangers of fluoride in our water/toothpaste. It will give a better explanation that I could. (youtube videos are easier, I think.) Next on the agenda is our own shampoo/conditioner... that one is just for fun.
My brother-in-law shot a deer for us this fall and I'm busy learning how to cook it. We ate a lot of antelope in Namibia and the experience is proving well now. Tonights menu, venison steak.
I got a juicer for my birthday and I LOVE it. T loves. The kids love it. And, it is FUN. Super fun! I highly recommend it.The possibilities are endless.
I turned 30 on Wednesday and am convinced my metabolism virtually came to a halt.
Motherhood:
Keano
Keano's back! I should have written about this more and sooner and am now overwhelmed at where to start and where to finish. Here are just a couple random thoughts/experiences....
* I didn't realize how much I missed him. In some ways it felt as if he was never gone.
* I am ever so grateful for his salvation. The time away from us and the situations he was in would make for a very hard and crusty heart had it not been for his understanding of the Gospel in that God is sovereign over all he has and will experience and that God is good. ...and the two are inseparable. It is a beautiful gift to have such 'Gospel conversations' with your children.
*We need play dates! Anybody have/or know a family with boys Keano's age, shoot me an email.
*We (T, myself, Keano, and Felicity) will be going back to Namibia in January (when the courts reopen) to finalize the NAM side of the adoption.
Ponderings
My mom told me not too long ago that one thing she wished she knew when my sister and I were children is that she wasn't responsible for making 'perfect' children. She thought that if she could just reason with us, prove to us what was right, and blah, blah, blah that we would make the 'right' decision and good choices.
...Now, she would tell you that unless the Living God rescues us, we will be nothing but sinful and there is no reasoning she or anyone could do to change our nature. (Not at all advocating here that we don't reason with our children as that is one of the primary means God uses to reach their hearts, but) My point is simply that it is impossible to raise good children unless God awakens them to their sinful hearts and need for a Savior. I know this concept might beg a lot of questions, but what I'm trying to get at is that I have realized that when Christians do 'miss the mark' it is a result of not trusting in some part of the Gospel. Anxiety, fear, outward or inward, whatever the 'sin' is, it is a result of not knowing and or trusting some part of the Gospel.
I often think that if I had understood the Gospel as I do now that it would have kept me from many mistakes, cycles, choices that I made in the past. This has gotten me thinking about parenting the Christian child.
I am not so naive to think that he will not sin. He will struggle. ...Scripture talk about how we all have a sin that 'easily entangles us,' but my job as a parent is to teach him as much as I can about the Gospel so that when those situations arrive he knows and understands the truth to apply to keep him out of the cycles of sin.
I want a formula. It's the truth. How do you do this?
"You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise." Deuteronomy 6:7 I understand being purposeful. ....but if it doesn't come naturally, or if you're so busy changing diapers, feeding babies and keeping a house rolling, you need a purposeful plan. I do not want to do teaching as a response to mistakes as much as I want to do preventative teaching. ....all those times - when you walk, when you lie, when you rise, they are all times of NON tension.
(As a side note, I realize that this Scripture is speaking of the 'laws' of God. This is not what I mean. I am talking about the doctrines of Scripture that the Christian clings to in order to keep them from a whole host of things that could be avoided had they known the Gospel.)
Any suggestions welcome :)
Todd
I know most wives think their husband is the best man in the world (as it should be!), but I just want to brag a moment (feel free to scroll down... again, just for my own remembrance. And, if something terrible should happen, I want my kiddos to be able to read my own words about how much I love their Daddy.)
My Love,
I love you. Christ in you is an ever flowing fountain of grace towards me. There is no other man that I would ever or could ever love as I love you. I am blessed beyond measure to call you my husband.
I pray for you. I pray that the Living God who has lavished Himself so richly on you would satisfy you to your deepest desire. I pray that He would make me a wife that is full of grace and wisdom towards you that I, through which, would cause you to love our Lord more.
I pray that he would answer the prayers of your heart and open a way for you to pastor a church and/or speak clearly to us for the direction of our family.
This past year and a half has been one of great hardship with many tears, but through it, God has graciously held us together and drawn us closer, not only to Himself, but to each other. We were homeless, jobless, back in a new culture, loosing our son, and having a baby. Yet, God.
Yet, God drew us and kept us and still draws us and keeps us to His good and sovereign Self. He has worked out character issues in us that we would have known we had, and yet through this all, he has enabled our marriage to grow stronger. Oh my love, what a God we know! What a God who knows us!
Blessed be His name in all the earth....
With the love of Christ, I write these things to you,
Erin Elizabeth
So, here is a completely and utterly RANDOM list of the goings on of the 'Hammer Tribe' (and me personally.)
Note: After writing this, I came back up to the top to add that this is a rather long and extremely random post. It's mostly for the purpose of being able to look back on, so REALLY, feel free to just wait (don't hold your breath) for something more thought provoking :)
Personally:
Blogging Memories
A friend, who's girls are now teenagers told me that she wished she would have kept a journal of some sort so she could remember things about her girls when they were young. She said "You think you will remember these sorts of things, but really, you don't." That being said, "I NEED TO BLOG MORE!"
Health
I'm looking into homeopathic remedies. Roll your eyes or ask me what I discover. I'm still somewhere in between those two myself.
I just made my/our own toothpaste and am quite pleased. As for why, just do a quick research on the dangers of fluoride in our water/toothpaste. It will give a better explanation that I could. (youtube videos are easier, I think.) Next on the agenda is our own shampoo/conditioner... that one is just for fun.
My brother-in-law shot a deer for us this fall and I'm busy learning how to cook it. We ate a lot of antelope in Namibia and the experience is proving well now. Tonights menu, venison steak.
I got a juicer for my birthday and I LOVE it. T loves. The kids love it. And, it is FUN. Super fun! I highly recommend it.The possibilities are endless.
I turned 30 on Wednesday and am convinced my metabolism virtually came to a halt.
Motherhood:
Keano
Keano's back! I should have written about this more and sooner and am now overwhelmed at where to start and where to finish. Here are just a couple random thoughts/experiences....
* I didn't realize how much I missed him. In some ways it felt as if he was never gone.
* I am ever so grateful for his salvation. The time away from us and the situations he was in would make for a very hard and crusty heart had it not been for his understanding of the Gospel in that God is sovereign over all he has and will experience and that God is good. ...and the two are inseparable. It is a beautiful gift to have such 'Gospel conversations' with your children.
*We need play dates! Anybody have/or know a family with boys Keano's age, shoot me an email.
*We (T, myself, Keano, and Felicity) will be going back to Namibia in January (when the courts reopen) to finalize the NAM side of the adoption.
Ponderings
My mom told me not too long ago that one thing she wished she knew when my sister and I were children is that she wasn't responsible for making 'perfect' children. She thought that if she could just reason with us, prove to us what was right, and blah, blah, blah that we would make the 'right' decision and good choices.
...Now, she would tell you that unless the Living God rescues us, we will be nothing but sinful and there is no reasoning she or anyone could do to change our nature. (Not at all advocating here that we don't reason with our children as that is one of the primary means God uses to reach their hearts, but) My point is simply that it is impossible to raise good children unless God awakens them to their sinful hearts and need for a Savior. I know this concept might beg a lot of questions, but what I'm trying to get at is that I have realized that when Christians do 'miss the mark' it is a result of not trusting in some part of the Gospel. Anxiety, fear, outward or inward, whatever the 'sin' is, it is a result of not knowing and or trusting some part of the Gospel.
I often think that if I had understood the Gospel as I do now that it would have kept me from many mistakes, cycles, choices that I made in the past. This has gotten me thinking about parenting the Christian child.
I am not so naive to think that he will not sin. He will struggle. ...Scripture talk about how we all have a sin that 'easily entangles us,' but my job as a parent is to teach him as much as I can about the Gospel so that when those situations arrive he knows and understands the truth to apply to keep him out of the cycles of sin.
I want a formula. It's the truth. How do you do this?
"You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise." Deuteronomy 6:7 I understand being purposeful. ....but if it doesn't come naturally, or if you're so busy changing diapers, feeding babies and keeping a house rolling, you need a purposeful plan. I do not want to do teaching as a response to mistakes as much as I want to do preventative teaching. ....all those times - when you walk, when you lie, when you rise, they are all times of NON tension.
(As a side note, I realize that this Scripture is speaking of the 'laws' of God. This is not what I mean. I am talking about the doctrines of Scripture that the Christian clings to in order to keep them from a whole host of things that could be avoided had they known the Gospel.)
Any suggestions welcome :)
Todd
I know most wives think their husband is the best man in the world (as it should be!), but I just want to brag a moment (feel free to scroll down... again, just for my own remembrance. And, if something terrible should happen, I want my kiddos to be able to read my own words about how much I love their Daddy.)
My Love,
I love you. Christ in you is an ever flowing fountain of grace towards me. There is no other man that I would ever or could ever love as I love you. I am blessed beyond measure to call you my husband.
I pray for you. I pray that the Living God who has lavished Himself so richly on you would satisfy you to your deepest desire. I pray that He would make me a wife that is full of grace and wisdom towards you that I, through which, would cause you to love our Lord more.
I pray that he would answer the prayers of your heart and open a way for you to pastor a church and/or speak clearly to us for the direction of our family.
This past year and a half has been one of great hardship with many tears, but through it, God has graciously held us together and drawn us closer, not only to Himself, but to each other. We were homeless, jobless, back in a new culture, loosing our son, and having a baby. Yet, God.
Yet, God drew us and kept us and still draws us and keeps us to His good and sovereign Self. He has worked out character issues in us that we would have known we had, and yet through this all, he has enabled our marriage to grow stronger. Oh my love, what a God we know! What a God who knows us!
Blessed be His name in all the earth....
With the love of Christ, I write these things to you,
Erin Elizabeth
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